Ben Stokes has finally explained the personal reasons behind one of the most dramatic retirement announcements in modern cricket, revealing that the emotional scars from Australia’s disastrous Ashes campaign left him feeling he “didn’t fight anymore” to continue representing his country.The England captain stunned the cricketing world on Sunday by announcing his retirement from international cricket at the end of the third Test against New Zealand at Trent Bridge, making it 15 years. Speaking bluntly after the match, the 35-year-old dismissed speculation about the latest controversy and instead pointed to the mental, physical and emotional exhaustion that has set in since England’s 4-1 Ashes defeat in Australia.
‘I don’t think I have any more fight left in me’
Explaining his feelings, Stokes revealed that a change came when he admitted his feelings to his wife.“The emotional side of it since Australia… how I said to my wife, ‘I don’t think I have any more fight left in me to finish this, to be honest’,” Stokes told Sky Sports.The England manager admitted that the realization hit him harder than he expected.“It did. You go through this whole process, talk to the people around you, and you start to explain a lot. The more I talked to my wife and others about it, the more you can block things,” he added.Stokes said that he has always prided himself on overcoming obstacles throughout his career, both on and off the field, but this time he proved different.“The other thing I had in the last five or six weeks was … it was another thing I felt I had to try and overcome. I felt like I’ve been pretty good throughout my career—overcoming frustration on the field, frustration off the field—but this was different.”
‘It’s cruel what we do’
After the emotional toll, Stokes admitted that staying at the top was tough.“It’s brutal that we do, physically, mentally. Even things that are far from it – that you have to put in and work hard – are a little boring these days,” he admitted.At 35, just getting his body ready to compete was a battle in itself.“I feel like I have to do a lot of physical work to keep doing what I’m doing out there. “Do I have the fight in me to continue doing it because of what I know is needed to go and play for this country?” he said.The answer, he admitted, was no.“There are a lot of things that have leaned into me knowing that this is the right decision—the emotional side, the physical side, the emotional side.”
A difficult but necessary goodbye
Stokes revealed that retirement had been on his mind for weeks and that he sought advice from those close to him before making the final call.“I gave myself every chance to think that maybe it was stupid or that something was wrong,” he said, adding that an open conversation with his family finally convinced him it was time.Despite his regrets, Stokes insisted on leaving without regrets.“This idea is the best thing for me right now. I believe it’s the best thing for the team going forward, but it’s going to help me continue to love the game that has given me so much.”The announcement brings to an end the international career of one of England’s greatest captains and all-rounders, a player whose legacy includes an unforgettable World Cup 2019 victory, the incredible Headingley Ashes and the fearless era of “Bazball” that revolutionized Test cricket in England.
